Couples Therapy for Lasting Change

Online across California

Feel Like a Team Again

You both want this to work—but keep finding yourselves in the same patterns.
Together, we slow things down to create lasting change, so your day-to-day can feel calmer, more connected, and more secure.

You love each other. But something needs to shift.

You’re having the same conversations, the same arguments, the same moments of disconnection—despite your efforts to communicate better, be more patient, or give each other space.

Maybe the tension has been building slowly over time. Or maybe something significant has happened, and now you’re trying to find your way back to each other.

Either way, it’s not just about conflict—it’s the feeling that something deeper isn’t being understood.

As much as you care about each other, you may be starting to wonder what it will actually take for things to change.

You’re not looking for more surface-level conversations.
You’re ready for something to shift—for real, lasting change in how you relate to each other.

If you’ve already tried to “work on it,” you’re not alone

Many couples come to this work after trying:

  • Communicating more clearly

  • Giving each other space

  • Reading, reflecting–even going to therapy

And still, something doesn’t stick.

Not because you’re not trying—
but because the pattern itself hasn’t changed.


You’re ready to:

  • Understand what keeps pulling you into the same patterns

  • See each other more clearly—without losing yourself in the process

  • Slow down conflict so it doesn’t escalate the same way every time

  • Feel heard and understood, even in difficult conversations

  • Make sense of how your histories, stress, and expectations are shaping the relationship

  • Reconnect in a way that feels more steady, honest, and sustainable

And it’s possible to shift what’s happening between you—without either of you losing who you are.

How this work unfolds

I’m Dr. Ly Franshaua Pipkins, a licensed clinical psychologist specializing in mind–body and nervous system–informed therapy for couples.

My approach is paced and collaborative:

We begin by slowing things down and making sense of the patterns you keep getting pulled into. Not just what’s happening on the surface, but what’s underneath it—expectations, reactions, and moments where things start to go off track. This creates a clearer, shared understanding so you’re not just reacting to each other, but actually seeing each other.

Each of you is also bringing your own history, stress, and ways of coping into the relationship. Using approaches like Brainspotting and emotion-focused work, I can help you begin to process what gets activated beneath the surface—because your individual experience matters, and it shapes how you show up with each other.

Then with emotion-focused work, I can help you begin shifting how you relate to one another in real time. We work directly with the moments that tend to get stuck—so you can respond differently, communicate more clearly, and stay more connected even when things are hard.

This isn’t just about learning communication skills.
It’s about working with the parts of you that make those skills hard to access in the first place.

Over time, the goal is not perfection—it’s a more steady, honest, and sustainable way of being together. Something you can actually carry into your day-to-day life.

The Process

While every couple is different, this work often moves through a natural progression.

We begin with a focused initial phase to create safety and clarity.

From there, most couples choose a structured period of continued work, where we meet regularly over 90 days to practice and deepen the changes that matter most.

The exact number of sessions and areas of focus are tailored to your relationship, your pace, and the patterns we’re working to shift.


This work is for couples who are:

This work is for couples who are:

  • Curious, and willing to look at themselves—not just each other

  • Ready to move beyond surface-level communication strategies

  • Committed to understanding the deeper patterns shaping the relationship

  • Open to a more structured process, not just occasional sessions

It may not be the right fit if:

  • One or both of you are not willing to engage in the process

  • You’re looking for a quick fix or someone to take sides

What happens next

We start with a 15-minute consultation to get a sense of what’s happening in your relationship and whether this approach fits what you’re looking for.

If it feels like a good fit, we’ll talk through next steps and how to begin.

Frequently Asked Questions

  • Many couples therapy approaches focus on communication skills, emotional expression, or structured interventions.

    In our work, we also focus on what happens beneath those moments—the patterns, nervous system responses, and reactions that make those skills difficult to access in real time.

    By combining dialogue with mind–body approaches like Brainspotting, we’re able to work both with the relationship dynamic and what each partner is carrying into it. This allows for change that is not just understood, but felt and sustained.


  • Most couples begin with an initial phase of work designed to create safety, clarity, and direction in the relationship.

    This initial phase is $2,000 and includes a series of extended sessions to help you begin shifting patterns right away.

    From there, many couples choose to continue into a more structured period of work over 90 days to deepen and stabilize lasting change. The level of ongoing support—and associated investment—varies depending on your relationship and goals.

    We’ll determine the right pace and structure for your work together during the consultation.

  • Not always—but most couples find that real change takes more than a few sessions.

    It’s one thing to understand your patterns. It’s another to respond differently in the moments that matter.

    The 90-day structure allows time not only for practice and integration, but also for moving through the point where motivation naturally dips. This is a normal part of any change process—and often where the most meaningful shifts begin.

    It also allows us to build on what you’ve learned, developing more advanced ways of relating over time rather than trying to do everything at once.

    You’re welcome to begin with the initial phase and continue from there in a way that feels right for you.

  • It’s normal for this work to feel more effortful at times.

    As new patterns are being practiced, you may notice moments of resistance or thoughts like, “This is harder than I expected.” That doesn’t mean something is going wrong—it often means something important is beginning to shift.

    We move at a pace that feels manageable, and you’re always free to take what you’ve gained and continue on your own.

    If you’d like additional support later, you’re welcome to return and pick up where we left off.

    Many couples find that moving through this phase is where the most meaningful changes begin to take hold.


  • Brainspotting is a brain–body approach that helps process emotional activation at the level of the nervous system.

    In couples work, it allows each partner to work through what gets triggered beneath the surface—so reactions become less automatic and more manageable.

    This often makes it easier to stay present, communicate clearly, and move through conflict without escalating in the same way.


  • Yes. Many couples seek therapy after a rupture in trust, including infidelity or other forms of betrayal.

    When something like this happens, it can feel disorienting—what once felt stable may no longer feel secure in the same way.

    In our work, we move carefully. This often includes making space for what each of you is experiencing, understanding what led to the rupture, and beginning to rebuild a sense of clarity and safety over time.

    For some couples, this process leads toward repair and a different kind of relationship. For others, it brings important clarity about what they want moving forward.

    The goal is not to rush a decision, but to support you in moving through this in a way that is thoughtful, grounded, and aligned with what matters most to you.


  • This work is designed as a structured process rather than drop-in or one-time sessions.

    For new couples, we begin with a focused initial phase and, for many, continue into a more consistent period of work so that changes have time to take hold.

    Part of this process is understanding that relationships evolve over time. As life circumstances shift and new stressors arise, it’s natural for couples to need support at different points.

    After completing the initial phases of work, some couples choose to return for occasional sessions or more focused support as needed.

  • We begin with a brief consultation to understand what you’re looking for and whether this work feels like a good fit.

    From there, we’ll outline next steps and begin building a structured path forward.